Tag: relationships

riding lessons

I went to dinner with a friend to The Mark, a Jean Georges restaurant in the Mark Hotel, tonight. It was a pre-birthday slash catching up dinner. The food was amazing (I had Branzino with couscous, he had the famous burger), our waitress, Ms Velasguez (didn’t catch her first name), was super sweet, and tonight was the first time I smiled in 3 days. My friend spent half the evening trying to knock some sense into me, yelling at me for not realizing I deserve better men. (The beginning half of the night was wasted on me telling him about The Boy). I’ve been told by my guy friends, girl friends, and husbands of my girlfriends that I deserve the world. So why is it that I haven’t met one person that’s offering said world to me? Hmmm? Regardless, whenever I talk to him I do feel better and I do slightly start to believe that settling is not an option.

I got home tonight, buzzed from the yummy Lychee Raspberry Bellinis, and I received a lovely email from my facebook husband on the other side of the world, also telling me to buck up and find a new (more deserving) horse to ride.

(My friend chose the restaurant because of the last line in the first paragraph of this snarky New York Times review. He said the sarcasm reminded him of me.)

down in the dumps

The Boy and I are not seeing each other anymore. Actually it was his decision. I received the news via email last night. Email.

I knew it was coming but I had hoped that it wouldn’t. I had been frustrated with his lack of effort and he felt I wanted too much. I knew from the beginning he wasn’t ready for something serious but neither was I. What does serious even mean? I was enjoying the time we spent together but I felt I was missing all the fun parts of dating, the part that comes with being pursued. I got to the point where I wondered, what is wrong with me? Why am I with a guy who says, “I like you but I can’t give you anything.” Why was I so accepting of that? Don’t I deserve someone who thinks, “Wow, I’ve got a great girl. I’m gonna do what I can to make her happy.”

I believe I do. So why am I feeling so sad?

tell me

Boys boys boys. They’re making me so frustrated right now! I’m a little tired of the last minute “hey you wanna grab a drink” texts. How about a real date? (although the one with Flight Boy didn’t go so well) How about calling ahead of time to make plans? I’m quite disappointed.

Flight Boy

I recently went on a date with Flight Boy. I’ve made this mistake many times before but I have yet to learn. I wasn’t overly excited about him when I met him but I thought, “He seems nice, why don’t I go on a date to see if there are any sparks?” From past experience these sparkless guys that “seem nice” that I date to “see how it goes”  have never worked out. Yet I tried again.

He invited me to a Mets game and while I am a Yankee fan I love baseball games in general so I agreed to go. I was a little hesitant though. On the one hand a baseball game is a fun date where there wouldn’t be too much pressure for face to face conversation. On the other hand these games could go on for hours and I would be stuck if I wasn’t having a good time.

I had been drinking for 4 days straight prior to the date, had very little sleep, and was running late because I took a train in from Jersey. I didn’t even have time to shower or change my clothes. He did everything right that day. He was very understanding of my “state,” made good conversation, and was a complete gentleman. And by gentleman I mean he kept he filled with hot dogs and beer. I thought it was a great date and he seemed like a great guy but I just didn’t feel any sparks. He just wasn’t for me.

The following day he texted to ask me if I was free this week for drinks. I didn’t want to waste either of our time stringing him along and debated what I could text back to turn him down “nicely.” But I had forgotten about the text and forgot to reply. About 2 hours later he sent me another text that read, “A simple ‘no’ would have been suffice.” UM. This made me livid. It was very hostile and rude. And where does he get off? How does he know I wasn’t busy, in class, at work, on a train, or just any place where I couldn’t text? This was a major dealbreaker for me so I definitely will not be seeing Flight Boy again.

Frankly, I’m surprised he’s interested considering the poor showing I made at the date. Isn’t it funny how there are dates where we take hours getting dressed and looking our best and we never hear back from the guy? And when we put in no effort (like negative effort) they’re interested.

coming out

We interrupt the regularly scheduled Utah Updates to bring you the news that The Boy and I are “coming out” tonight. You see, we met about 2 months ago through a mutual friend. We began seeing each other shortly after and dug ourselves into a little secret hole. Before our first date, neither of us mentioned it to our friends. We felt like if we said, “Hey, we have something to tell you…” it seemed like some sort of admission of guilt. But if we didn’t say anything then we were clearly sneaking around. After the first few dates we debated how to handle telling everyone. We didn’t want to say something too soon just in case it turned out to be nothing. But then we kept waiting and now it’s 2 months later. At first we felt really guilty. Our friends would say what are you up to and we would both lie. But then it became a funny inside joke. We would laugh about all the ridiculous possible ways we would tell them. Now, it’s still funny, but we’d kinda would like to be able to see in other in public, not that snuggling and watching movies on the couch isn’t fun.

So tonight we’re gonna break it to them slowly by saying we “bumped into each other” on the subway and decided to go for a drink. This all probably sounds a bit ridiculous. I mean, why would our friends even care that we’re seeing each other? I guess we’ve just waited too long and they might find it weird since they probably can’t see us together. Anyway, moral of the story…While secrets can be fun and send you into giggle fits, telling the truth, more often, is probably a better idea…